Renounce the illusion, Maya, that is this world. Renounce the self...become one with existence.

Meditate. Meditate...

ANNOUNCEMENT: "Milosevic accuses the US of aiding Al-Qaeda."

Okay...okay...don't let that rattle you. He's just a genocidal tyrant who thinks the most outrageous doublespeak will confuse the judges and get him off...

Ommmm...

"The Afghan minister of transportation was lynched by a mob at the airport yesterday. They were trying to get on a plane to make the holy pilgrimage to Mecca, and their planes were delayed..."

Gee, I wonder if lynching a person trying to get to a holy place qualifies as silly as trying to kill someone to promote peace?

Waitasecond. Clear my minds of all extraneous thoughts...

Ommmm....

"The Olympic committee has awarded a second set of gold medals to the Canadian team in Skategate..."

Skategate?

Clear. Clear. Make my mind a blank. Meditate.

Ommmm...

"The House has just passed a campaign reform package. The Senate passed it months ago. The big question is...will Bush veto it?"

This too shall pass. Concentrate on nothingness. Let go of all earthly cares, of life's clinging to the mind...

"Iran, which has become much more moderate in the last two decades, which nevertheless Bush denounced as part of the 'axis of evil', captured 150 Taliban and Al-Qaeda fighters..."

Ommmm....Ommmm....oh, for Pete's sake, Ommmm....

"Colin Powell has been given stiff criticism by conservatives and even members of the Bush administration for daring to suggest that condoms, not celibacy, might be a sensible precaution against AIDS, other sexually tansmitted diseases, and overpopulation...a stand very unpopular in his own party, and with his own President, who favors celibacy..."

Ommmm....Ommmm....Aw, c'mon now, Ommmmmm....

"The Congressional probe into the Enron scandal has unearthed a lot of Enron executives who take the fifth, and a lot of lawmakers who take this oppurtunity to preach and upbraid the executives...this despite the fact that both sides, Republicans and Democrats, received huge contributions from Enron."

Blot it out. Concentrate on your mandala...Ommm....

"Brian's off to Gatlinburg, but he still wants you to tape that show he likes tomorrow morning..."

Ommmmmm....

"The car is going to need some major work done..."

Ommmm...

"Eric went swimming yesterday with his class. That went well. Luckily he didn't..."

"EEEEEEYAAAAAHHHHHAAAAYAHHHH!!!!"

"...scream...

"The whole trip."

I give up. Enlightenment and nirvana is not for me.

Yes, we have no Nirvanas, we have no Nirvanas today...